When life just isn't fair
by venus800
Summary: It hurts, to have everything in the palm of your hand. Everything you wanted, everything you couldn't have before, everything that made you happy right there in front of you... And then have it ripped away.


_ When life just isn't fair_

When rose was left on Bad Wolf Bay with the meta-crisis doctor she felt a multitude of emotions. From elation and immeasurable joy for having her doctor there with her with so many opportunities in front of them. To sorrow that ran deep for the Doctor she could never have and a loneliness that was knowing that they could never no matter how much he tried ever get a happy ending. Her Doctor had to adapt to a life without a TARDIS and domestication, it wasn't all bad there were alot of hugs and kisses and alot of love between them. He started working with Torchwood helping them with alien dialect and artifacts and helping out in the field with rose. They helped create a alias with a fake background and a new name it wouldn't do just to be called The Doctor. And since he was together with the Vitex empires heiress he needed a proper name. After a few silly convorsations they decided on John Smith since he went by that often Enough. They had a good laugh at that, they were happy her and her doctor, but the good never lasts. It was a year a good year filled with happiness and laughter and smiles. A year filled with jokes and proposals and prospects of future family and kids, "The whole domestic shin-bang" The Doctor would say. A year with more love than most people felt in two lifetimes. A year before everything went to hell.

* * *

It was a simple mission really, get in, scope the smugglers hideout out, then get out. They would've made it if it wasn't for her rookie mistake. It was her fault, Rose remembered that much. She had accidentally set off a series of traps creating a firefight between her and the smuglers. She had her back turned so she didn't see it coming, but the doctor had. Her sweet and clever doctor who never carried a gun always having the "moral hi-ground" jumped behind her and took the bullet. Right through his now singular heart. Much was a blur after that. She remembered spinning around and shooting the smuggler just before dropping to the ground near her doctor murmuring 'this shouldn't be happening's' or 'please god no's'. She remembered his eyes flickering open and closed and when he realized he was fighting a losing battle, he looked to Rose to finnish a sentence that had been left unsaid "Well Rose Tyler" he said between rasping breaths " if it's my last chance to say it" Rose looked at him in horror " no doctor please hang on p-please just just hang on alright?" she said tone turning desperate " This is no time for goodbyes. Were were gonna get married and and start a family and were gonna argue over names. W-were gonna name our first Albus or Molly 'cause you love Harry Potter so much then were gonna name one after one of my parents and-and we-were gonna have a proper family"she said choking on a sob. "Rose Tyler" he took a rasping breath, his last."I love you" Before he closed his eyes forever. "Doctor?" Rose cried because she didn't know what else to do" Doctor?! Doctor please please ,please, don't do this to me again!" She screamed sobbing." Wake up ! Please oh please doctor! Just wake up" she yelled. She let out a wordless yell of sorrow and pain and loss. Hating the universe for ripping him away from her. "Why him!" She screamed up into the sky"He gave so much up already, both of us have! So why him!?" she sobbed into his shirt.

* * *

She didn't notice the back up that came up to late. That were staring at her with a mix of pity and guilt. She screamed and kicked at the paramedics that tried to take her away from him. To treat her injuries they said. It didn't matter to her though all she could think was that it was her fault that it should of been her. She could barley remember the days afterwords. The funeral was terrible bringing on memories she couldn't handle she ran out half way through. She came back when no one was around to place flowers on his grave. Forget-me-nots his favorite. He was buried by Bad wolf Bay where their life together was re-started. Back when they were still a possibility. That night she sat down by his grave and cried and sobbed and raved about broken promises about never abandoning her, screaming at him, at the world and at the universe about a life just starting and ending so soon, the unfairness of it all.

It hurts, to have everything in the palm of your hand. Everything you wanted, everything you couldn't have before, everything that made you happy right there in front of you... And then have it ripped away. Even when you worked so hard to keep it. That pain you feel when you relies that life just isn't fair. That's the pain Rose Tyler feels everyday of every morning now because life is not kind and it certainly is not fair.


End file.
